Deliverance of a Retiree. Dated: 2007 Aug 3

Chemistry UKM - An Infant in 1970-1980's Final Update, 2007 Apr 19, (if they were not deleted)

A Costly Passion - 2007 Jun 19

Those Were the Days 1978

Count Down to Retirement 2007 Apr 20

A Farewell to UKM - 2007 Jun 9

The Epic of Chitosan - 2007 July 15

Deliverance of a Retiree 2007 Aug 3

Ke Tepian Sang Seluang Melaut 2007 Nov 3

I chose to ignore this part. It was very hard to commit with any figure.

2004 Nov 25, UKM reminded its 2007 to-be-retiree, in a circular that I would retire 2007 Apr 20 Friday. I recieved it 2004 Nov 30 Tue. With the reminder, was the request to submit several documents for them to proceed, including the marriage certificate, or all documents related to the marital history of the to-be-retiree. I would then, which ever comes first, completed 56, to exit the UKM, to begin the new, most probably the last, phase of life. That was ca. 25 months to the date.

It was like a paratrooper being ejected from the plane to be landed at a certain spot, as accurately a possible within the given ample elevation to glide. The university had a team to manage the exiting staff in peace and every one in one piece. For an ubiquitous worker like me, the first thing first: declaration of assets which took a few days to dig for the particulars. It was to be endorsed by the immediate superior, and submitted together with the requested documents. Except for the marital documents, the rest could be made at the date line. The former needed some digging for it was rarely produced over the past thirty one years.

2005 Jan 19 Wed

Briefing for to-be-retirees 2007, another step count down to my own. The attendees were from all "walks of life" in the campus. It was in the senate meeting room, fifth floor, the Admin Bldg. For the only ever occasion, a driver could feel the cosiness of the senate meeting room (which previously for the whole of his service life, he only had heard of it), and sat next to a professor; both appeared indifferentiably helpless. The officer who briefed on the retiring procedures, with an eerie ghostly rhythm voice, reminded the shock that would come when a 15K professor would end up with a mere 3K retiree. In the proper government institution, the pre-retirees were given the opportunity to undergo a reorientation programme, so that the "cultural shock" would be averted. Some were lucky when they became senile immediately on becoming a retiree that they forgot what it was like to live in a 15K life with each of his ten finger nails were polished with the regalia of powers, the time when their words reveberated all the earth surface in the campus. The officer missed to tell the to-be-retiree that even on the retiring day, every one alive in the campus will go against him.

I was so ignorant. For the first time since joining the "modal insan" of UKM in 1974 Aug, I saw in b/w the benefits of being a retiree. Before that I heard them by 'hearsay' thus many time did not dominate in my RAM. Now I recalled the so lurid and comprehensive 'discussions' sporadically during the coffee break during which I chose to pleasurise more on the caffeine.

2006 Feb 3 Fri, a good samaritan popped this form into my pigeon hole. Thanks mate, of course I was interested in the (ii) category. The timing of submission is crucial though - waiting for any signs, just like that in 1984. A kind of situational: too late after Sep, but too predictable before that. Observing the content to be filled in the form, I could sense the essence why my 'seniors' became restless when they were given it monthly, in full though, unlike some of others who were "blessed" bi-, or tri-enially.

The hope was high, but even the South East Asian Monsoon some times was unpredictable. The microscopic activities were very hard to see. And for ordinary worker, there is no means at all to dip deep in it. The university is full of serenggettic Piper sarmentosum which may change colour like an iguana according to the mood and season. This is their opportunity to condense all those clouds into a torrential rain. Now or never. But this was not part of the retirement count down. This was actually a matter after the retirement. And it is not the only matter. Many more matters perhaps are of higher priority. I used to give a deep thought about not just following the crowd; be with something I could satisfy myself even it was differ from others. It pays.

Colleagues like Mohamad Md Tan, and last year, Rashidi, definitely opted as they wished for somethings else. The former even enjoyed the three months statuary previlages.

The academic culture in this part of the orient is that of the developing countries. Academicians are the "knowledge administrator", they opined. They are the administrators. Thus administratively they are subjected to the administrators rules and regulation as laid down by the administrative body.

2006 Mar 7 Thu. Retelling of the story of five 'budak hitam' who travelled from five remote corners of the peninsular; respectively below: Melaka, Terengganu, Kelantan, Johor, and Perak. They met at one place and 'frolic-ed' together until about sun-set.

In 1967 Jan in their alphabetical order, when they checked-in SAS. In 1971 May they proceeded to UKM to read chemistry.

In 1974 Aug in their increasing order of check-in staff-number (incidentally, consecutively) in UKM. Then in Sep they left for England, in the same planes (all of them the first time flyer): MH824, LH667, AZ422, LH030; to read higher level chemistry.

By 1983 Mar they were all well anchored in the chemistry UKM teaching high level chemistry. They played together along the time-line, gulping the air to their own destiny. Come 2007, beginning in Jan, one by one will stop blinking on the radar screen: in the natural order of disappearence; however, nature could mysteriously change.
gone 2007 Apr 20 to retire 2008 Jul 8 retired 2007 Feb 8; restarted to retire 2007 Dec 23 retired 2007 Aug 18; restarted
In the increasing order of stretching (arbitrary scale) as at Mar 7 Tue. They would evaporate piece-wise from ukm in their own individual time.

Especially with this kind of sum. The thing I was rather irky from time to time since PTK6 2003 Oct 18. And especially during moments like this. May be I could not walk my talk if I were a manager. That's why I was not a manager.

Sometimes avoiding is needed knowing that soon you would know that you are of different 'race' who would lose in the race.

2006 The May Day. Slowly, eleven months to go, but surely; packing, and cleaning the masses I did in this 2154 'box' since 1983 Mar; many things only the creator remembered; the carvings about something done and dispensed; those indespensable papers; documents without which life would be very hard to go on, the copies of which are next to non-existence. Some of them arrived here from somewhere while others were the casted shadows of those created here, and all these while are here. Very soon, for the first time, and the only time, they will move, then eventually they become nobody's interest. Physically they are just papers; but the words are about many 'souls', some of them would stay for a long time to come in different forms of matters. Being a lecturer was like a pulsar: creating and radiating the wave in all directions to distances, dissipated only by the frictions. A lecturer virtually has no competitor; like a pulsar, the nearest pulsar is a galaxy away. I lived with many 'ghosts' in this box. They would not leave in 2007 Apr 20 because this place is theirs. The new occupier would have to be very careful if he-she want to stay in peace like I did for twenty-four years.

2006 Jun 23 Fri. The May second "mission", scheduled to be accomplished at the month end, was "deferred" by a month, waded out into the time buffer, completed only in Jun end. The outcome, not before the end of the year, would be in several shapes, depending on one's current 'sq'. The supreme shape is that of the kind of today that follows yesterday to be followed by tomorrow plus the difference. The worst was that of getting non-written words before submission. In between are those permutations among the time quanta of a month, three months, a year, two years, three years, and the renumeration figures of the colonial estate kind - take it or leave. An unxpected phantom was waiting the worst in my case - the non-written reply. Well, again, this is not part of the retirement countdown.

2006 Aug 25 Fri Sayonara ... I was luckier in this respect.

It doesn't say who said that though. Someone thought of unimind talk on behalf of everyone;

Aug 25 Fri late afternoon, VC #9 was farewelled in elegance, beginning with a festival of eulogy in the Senate Meeting Room, then down to the g-floor (a.k.a. gallery-floor) to take the PALAPES last salute, and off out of the campus. The jaga at the gate, switching to military mode, gave the last salute at the university edge. They have to, because Aug 26 Sat was his last day.

Several days before that, tributes for him was specially created in e-warga portal for those who would like it known to others that they pay tributes. It was opened for the university's community only though. That made him smiled all day long in those last several days.

Last logout.

He was dubbed "Bapa pengantarabangsaan UKM - the Father of Internationalisation of UKM", or was he given, or was he accorded, or was he acquired, or was it that he claimed, or was it that he accepted the suggestion that he be accorded. The previous eight VCs was not associated with any attribution - especially #3 in whose time UKM needed "internationalization" in order to attach the pioneer and the penultimate pioneer graduates in the established universities for postgraduate studies to qualify them to become the UKM staff -; even some were not properly farewelled. They were just like the many DVCs or the deans who come and go. Being academicians, one could not resist the temptation to know how differ "internationally" UKM was, delta plus, or delta minus, relative to the era whence UKM did not have such a personnel. So far no quantitative data are available, don't even mention any quantitative study. The only quantitative data available are the number of international flights that have been booked for him and the number, and the 'personnels' each in every of his entourage - the registrar and bendahari, not excluded. The bendahari had all the figures and the financial figure and the procedural reasons for them, judging by the very jig-saw-type procedures the bendahari stapled on when come to the expenditure by academicians - albeit, the grant the academician applied and awarded. He set a very tough 'pace' indeed for the incoming #10, including that about the inaugural lecture things which he first set not before the ascension. It was drizzling at vic 4 late afternoon Aug 25 Fri, but turned mad like a stampeding bisons batallion when the sun set.

2006 Oct 12 A Next Step Closer - Base to Galax 1. The inter-galactic communication channel is switched on.

The copy of which I recieved today, Oct 12 Thu. Note the possibilities. The level of professional of the person undertaking the matter with such silly error. The level in clinical equivalent of a patient going for an ear illness but getting the eye medicine - and suffer for the rest of life, and the most he/she would get is "I'm sorry". Those days this kind of thing does not occur, or improbable to occur. These days this is what occurs. The thing is, everybody does not mind when this occurs. Imagine the equivalence in general practising. Or simply a common sense for a going person to accept his/her unusefullness, compared to the incoming staff who has all the possible potentials.

2006 Nov Surprises from the 'Sky' Fundamental Research Grants of the Ministry of Higher Education which every body was at them like mad in Sep, fertilised and hatched. One of Dr Ishak made it, small though, around 60K for one and the other required three. But this one, and a few others did not make any effect on the countdown. So the 'owner' did not bother to liason once the agreement was signed. The one with Dr Ambar did not survived, although he servived to become a full professor after the submission. Previous month submission was the e-Science under Prof Dr Pauzi; the proposal we worked out together with Dr Jumat, to Nov end, had not been seen kicking in the midst of others which were all chirping in high pitch. Next round perhaps.

2006 Nov 1, Galax 1 to Galax 2

The first beacon of a communication blip from distance galaxies. Obviously the receiving end was not in the smiling mood. It had every reason for that. Unfortunately, the txt code was handed to me 2007 Apr 9 Mon on my visit to the floor 5 to enquire about the status of the IRS cert. It was kept there for that long.

2007 Dec 5 Base to Galax 2, Furnishing the earlier alert

2006 Dec 8 Another Inter-Galactic Channel was Switched On, Base to Galax 3

2006 Dec 8 On the same day the fate might mechanically had been decided. I had no means at all to tell. It would be made known earliest by Feb next year 2007. I met many friends, i.e. at a minimum we have met before, along the line, and everyone suggested a conclusion of similar fate. I guessed they based it on the majority incidents. When comes to an individual, statistic does not operate; the average value is functionless. The probability is either one or zero. It will be purely fate, nothing to do with the majority incidents.

2007 Jan 5

The re-emmigration procedures began from the office back home. Bit by bit, bigger bit obviously. A surprise 'reunion' with a tool in my undergraduate, the slide rule, the "stetoscope" of engineers and scientists in 1970's. The first 'shipment' to go home, Jan 5 Fri. Collection of working papers, drafts and manuscripts as old as since 1970's, the books of which had been published.

2007 Feb 07

Galax 3 responded with a final calculation, but ignorant me, I could not tell whether this is the same as those anually assessed which I usually do when the university income statements were released, usually in Mar, for May date line.

So I waited for a little longer.

2007 Mar 06

It was like the arrival of a ferry after barely crossed to the opposite bank. It's good for others who learned to do good to themselves by reciprocating to everybody. It is a hate to express its gratefulness explicitly even though it was ostensibly hard works. The deliberation that I had been yelling when my stepometer dead-stopped ten years ago unable to rest in peace at its next final one last step.

It did not worth very much this year 2007. Had it been in 2006, it could mean something, and it would ease and unstress so much agony. Obviously they did not listen to my cry.

2007 Mar 22 Thu

Been on leave since Jan, a few days a week, on the no-lecture days. The last e-cuti form filled: yesterday 2007 Mar 21 Wed. Concluded, from today, all the leave remaining to the edge just before the R-Day. The three days remaining were calculated. A day for the final exam (2922 and 1113 which were like deliberately packed into a single day - Apr 17 Tue). A day for the farewell on the last day Apr 19 Thu. And the third day for the token friendship with UKM (without login-logout after the R-Day, a.k.a. burn).

The only reason to be in today was the high-noon 2922 in 130B. And the belated viva in the late afternoon of the limping thesis of a belated final sem student, examined by Prof Dr Md Pauzi. It was over in peace.

2007 Mar 23; 1428 R'Awal 4 Fri

The last pay slip: Mar 23 Fri. The last one-piece pay slip arrived this morning. For 2007 Mar. Next month nineteen days pay would not come in one piece like this. Perhaps belated via a voucher, depending on the clearance about how much I owe to UKM. And also the IRS matter which to this date I have not yet visited for the total clearance. Surprisingly the old "face" reappeared. What ever happened to the new face that appeared in Jan and Feb?

The cold of leaving began to touch the nerve when some remnants jobs being done at home were asked about through a phone call. Apparently it cooked into an agony of insomnia. Even after many hours of focus at night designing the cover for the MJAS 2007 Vol 11.

2007 Mar 29; 1428 R'Awal 10 Thu

The device that made its appearance ca. 2002. It went well with windows 2000, but needed to be installed - meaning "personalised" for each on each SU - in Windows 98. It cost ca. 1 rm per mb, viz. 1k rm for 1 gb piece. That had distracted me. I waited. Today it cost 40 rm. And the university eventually realised that then it was the "paper" of the time. I was provided one. Nonetheless twenty days before retirement. Perhaps the university forgot that I was retiring.

2007 Mar 30; 1428 R'Awal 11 Fri

Managed to "catch" Fauziana in the morning in her office to arrange for the course of online grading for lecturers. Targeted date Apr 19 Thu, my last day. The plan B is Apr 16 Mon. To be made compulsory to all lecturers. Other days were occupied. The job clearly marked for my action. Sarcastic indeed knowing that I had only a few days left.

2007 Apr 1 Sun

FINAL MONTH. APR 2007. Nineteen days to go, including today. The last telephone bill from UKM for the private calls I made from the set on my table. One call in Jan and three in Feb. All to my home. Total duration 4 minutes 52 seconds. Total charge, 40 sen.

2007 Apr 2 Mon

THE LAST CHEMSITRY LECTURE IN UKM. That of 2922 DAM 10-11 am. On Q-e scheme of estimating the reactivity ratios of comonomers in a free radical chain copolymerisation. 159 registered students; co-lecturing with Dr Rusli Daik, my student in early 1980's when I newly returned from England.

The whole course was about the fundamental principles of polymerisation. In the evolution of UKM's chemistry this paper had changed code many times. So did its slot in the bachelor curriculum. I studied this subject when I was in third year UKM 1973 from Dr Mohamad Salleh Suwandi. During my master programme in Salford in 1974-1976, I attended the undergraduate lectures of Dr Brown and Dr Huglin (who became my supervisor when I returned for my PhD in 1979) which more or less were revisions of what I had studied from Dr Suwandi. In UKM this subject was offered in the 3000 level (third year), until quite recently when the 3+0 100 credits was adopted, it was offered in the 2000 level (second year).

I began teaching polymer chemistry subjects as soon as I returned from England in oct 1976. And physical chemistry too. And after my returned from a study leave 1979-1983. By 1988 I published the "Prinsip Kimia Polimer" for students to use as the textbook for the fundamental course. The only polymer subjects in the postgraduate course was 6122, which I designed, which was introduced in 2002-03 Sem 2, which was actually a very much mixture with the fundamental physical chemistry, which I taught initially with Prof Ibrahim Abdullah, then with Dr Maimunah.

2007 Apr 4 Wed

Had not been into e-warga for quite some times - since concluding to the edge all the leave. In the Rivera morning discourse they said that the pressure had built up and the anxiety was equally mounting. The target was an invariant but the interpretation was quizzy - the jpa style whose only interpretation of its own rule is correct. To many it didn't make matter beyond that it was a cookies of the time in the campus. A few of course do. And in any which way. Dr Harun who ended the 1113 lectures yesterday afternoon dropped by in the morning to have the latest rapport the exam of which had been fixed on Apr 17 Tue, and unchanged.

For many, life go on as usual, detached from the HR department. The lab-coat which I recieved today, perhaps that of the last year 2006 budget. And the academic, just read from their record about who is with the paper; issued the invigilation duty. Apr 17, morning and afternoon. Two days before my end day. For 6122 it was ignorantly scheduled Apr 23, four days after my end. Who care anyway!

2007 Apr 11 Wed

Galactical journey commenced today. Alya accompanied in a "mission" to Wisma PGRM, Jln Pudu Ulu. The eerie 8th-12th floor. The IRS matters that would set the offset of the new phase. To make the journey merrier, travelled by komuter to Tasik Selatan, then STAR to Chan Sow Lin which needed a switch to Maluri. PGRM is only a walking distance away. The mission accomplished in forty five minutes at almost mid-day. The "life-or-death" document was released, and copied to the base and Galax 1. The base noted a delivery of a copy of similar theme to Galax 1, but could not understand, its date Mar 30. The place was actually very comfortable, fast service, and enveloped by an atmosphere of welcome. Of course, that is where the transfers are in quantums of K and almost always in one way. But the whole business took nearly three and a half hrs of the mid day span.

The place is at the corner of the Pudu Rd end continuing with what used to be called Cheras Rd. I looked back at this place during my SAS days. Facing the PGRM was a corner shop-lot that housed "Heng Lee Printing Co, 7A Jalan Pudu Ulu, Cheras Road, KL". It was here, all SAS printings were done, including the ASAS magazines, all the mechanical progress of which were carried out wholly by the students; for four years 1967-1970 I was in SAS, the megazine never late to go back home with the student at the long vacation mid nov every year.

With that I skipped the PP meeting 2/2007 in the afternoon. I knew beforehand that there were many jobs assigned to ICT committee. But in the first place I could not understand the chairman's mind of having me still in business whereas I was going in a fortnight. He should mind a farewell instead.

My next mission would be to a place where some of my dried sweats were kept against my will and they made many smiles out of it. The centre of provident fund. A visitor here may give some inconvenience, in many ways, including in trying the exercise his right. He may find that the mood were not so welcoming.

2007 Apr 12 Thu

Unexpected f2f in the morning Rivera discourse. I knew he knew what was in my head. He knew I knew that he deliberated it in which ever way. I stayed as I was in 1970's. Every one around could tell the kind of exothermic clouds.

At home almost done with the migration from 1700T to V3203TU of the indespensable data. The rest were backup or pre-cd folders. So far none was missed, or corrupted during the migration. Including things that needed to be reinstalled fresh from their original sources.

Received today 2007 Apr 12 Thu home-addressed, the official farewell from the university dated 2007 Apr 4, signed by a rather junior ceo. Unsure about the farewell occasion. Unlike the appointment which was signed by the pendaftar himself. I wonder who signed the letter when an NC, is retiring. All others who recieved this letter were administrative, except the fourth, YDP of the PKAUKM. I hope he "order" the bendahari to stop taking 3 rm of my money, the monthly fees. I do not wish to stop it myself. Let it take its own natural death even if it continues after my retirement, until they found out that I have no more salary. It's ok for 3 rm a month for the PKAUM. Never mind its disfunction. All the content in the LAMPIRAN A were related to money, directly or indirectly. Item iii was accompalished yesterday. Including the "order" in the laporan perubahan gaji, which said my first service was 1984 Dec 1, which was actually the first date for the current post. My first service in UKM was 1974 Aug 10. They were colour-coded. This one with the green colour which one would receive once only.

Nocopy for pendaftar academik. No wonder I kept on receiving the instructions. I bet there will be some letters for me from the pendaftar academik after Apr 20. Especially during this post-exam season. For sure from the faculty for the 6122.

2007 Apr 17 Tue

Logged-in to invigilate the examination of STKK2922 with co-lecturer Dr Rusli 8.30 DECTAR. Another chemistry paper of Dr Ishak and Dr Amran Majid with whom I always have resourceful discussion and discourse. And trustfully so today with a deeper confidentiality. And Prof Yahya Mahmud, my ukm-mate biologist turned biopsychologist in the social science faculty. And another paper perhaps from FPI. Then, after logout, STKK1113 with co-lecturers Dr Harun and Dr Ishak, 15.30 DP BESTARI with many more papers. Another science paper of Dr Ahmad Ismail. But other colleagues, many were just met in occasion like this, were academically warm. Not less than six papers from various faculties were "posted" here.

I passed on all the post-exam matters of both papers to the respective co-lecturers. They would pick up from where I left to the submission end of the marks. The marking would be done by the optical reader.

2007 Apr 18 30 Wed

Stand by. Bracing for anything. I asked Dr Rozali, the Chemistry programme head, to take a special look at my five hons students theses who had submitted without my full attention during the last week submission period. More boxes were imported from Yazid in the lab. Gave a bundle of "Amali Kimia Polimer" to Dr Maimunah that she co-authored many years ago. That book did not have the chance to be read by student because when it was published - 25 years UKM - polymer practical was no longer an entity.

Made the last visit to the panel clinic for our "ration", at least good for another fifteen days. Tomorrow the log-book would be surrendered, and from Apr 20 I would no longer enjoy the facility at the panel clinic on the university courtesy. I had been on this clinic (previous name: Pusat Rawatan Islam Bangi) since mid 1997, after "running away" from the one in Jln 1/4 since our tenure in Bangi from 1983 Mar because our trust was betrayed. That clinic enjoyed a very large patronage because it has a lady doctor no other clinic has at that time. And one of my SAS school mate, Dr Sulaiman Osman, a colleague in the medical faculty, was a locum. And the same reason we picked for the new clinic. While the first clinic had closed down, the second clinic's original lady doctor had moved on. Many other clinics around Bangi now are swarmed with lady doctors, but they are young and inexperienced. I had several anecdots. Like chemists, doctors too have to keep on learning from time to time. Not only new things, but also things that they had missed. And like chemistry, halopathy has several methods that a doctor may choose to approach.

2007 Apr 19 Thu

LAST DAY IN UKM. The arrival was like that of a celebration. Even looking forward since yesterday and thro to the night at home. Many friends were very supportive and sympathetic in cheering me up, many even since yesterday.

But the smooth one piece exit I planned was marred by the ewarga network down. I kept the record that it was 7.18 am that I loged-in, not 8.50 am as in their log. I will make up anyway that 50 minutes lag on the exit logout although I have one day of unspent leave. I have made the promise that the one day unspent is for the token of friendship with UKM. I wanted no due to UKM on my exit dot. Other parts of the network was running. Including the webmail. I took the opportunity to update the NAV virus definition - dated Apr 18 [20070418-024-x86.exe]. And spyware scanning, in case a new definition was published.

Regular colleagues were in the Rivera to greet. The candidate appeared to begin to feel that he was the numero uno in the faculty. The others were the audience who he thought responded at every "punch line".

Collected the MatriQ matters from the office which arrived yesterday. Into the boot of WCG, to be taken to Seremban Royal Adelphi Apr 23 Monday for the usual biannual gathering. Shown to Prof Pauzi at the desk PC of the gen office that MJAS Vol 10 no 2 was downloadable. Shown also the cover for the Vol 11 No 1, already on the net. Handed the resume to Rohaya. It was a quick extension from my 2004 resume of the ill-fated grade-C application.

10.20 went to the 5th floor for final matters. On the way up met at the zero-lift, the FPI dean. He was stunned by my not receiving the contract letter and humorously suggested to return to UDiM. Surrendered the health log-book. Scribbled a letter to pendaftar for the permission to keep the ID card. Verbally done about the library since I had not borrowed any book (not since the advent of the net - from ca. Windows 95). Had a chat with En Shahir Naim, about going on things in the abstract I did not know whether we understand each other or not. One thing we invariably agreed. That the life-line is always from up there and only from up there. On the way down in the lift met En Razak the senior principal assistant pendaftar FST. Also expresses surprise of the non-receiving. I could not gauge his authenticity.

While around that corner of the 'world', I strolled the back corridors of the FSSK complexes along which I passed only a few times through out my 33 years in UKM. To Pusanika. Passing along the offices of lecturers of FSSK, perhaps of psychology deparment or something. Judging by the door-tags, only a few had PhD. All their offices were carved-nyatoh-wooden-doored, unlike ours which were plywood - the original 1980's, except that of the professors who insisted to the change which we were made to understand they qualified. Paid the electric and water bills at the post office after distilling the fund at the CIMB tellar - and hi-ed to the emerging-out manager who always greeted me nicely whenever I had matters in the place. The turn-calling-ding-dong at the post office kept on clucking for the next customer. At the same time the turn-number dispenser kept on peeping in error and no turn-number slip came out for the scarsely customer - almost zero-time waiting.

Then down to the cafe for a light meal. Deputy Dean FST, who I had a glance in the post office, stamping a letter, was there and had the meal together. Too innocent to bring the matter over. Did not even know how to mime my not-receiving even though I knew that he knew it. My case, and another more injurous case was the talk of the time in the faculty. This was the first time I have my meal there, since the new operator took over. Students were frozen in the exam period, thus not many swarming the eatery. But the food look, variety and attire appeared good. Including the young female tenders of mixed complexion. Many chinese students too, unlike during the previous operator. Have not enough attention to gauge the price which normally extrapolates to a "life-span" approximation. A glass of white hot tea, a "blank" roti canai, and half-keel chicken. 3.40 rm.

It was nearly twelve. Taxonomising and stacking the boxes in the cube. Then it was a prolonged home break. I was an ordinary staff in UKM who evolved from an ordinary student. It was the mere time that was on my side. My exit was so infinitesimal, of nano-size in today's term. Even if I were a star, it was a little star in a giant distant galaxy. I twinkled only locally, known only to very close friends. And I did not make quite a neutron star on my exit.

It's now 5 pm. My time in UKM is officially OVER. But I will hang on for another 50 minutes to make over the lag due to the ewarga breakdown. Juggling the contents of the boxes for easier transportation to the destination - seven km away. LAST e-mail checked 5.40 pm on Eudora from IP. Later, it would be from home streamyx via web-based webmail. In three months time this e-mail acc will be closed. Then perhaps I would be on gmail dot com, or yahoo dot com.

Room 2154 Level 2 Chemistry Building, South Wing. The room I had been aboding since 1983 Mar 16 Wed. Together with the accompanying Lab 2144 opposite of it. 24 years 34 days. Strange feeling. I did not feel the room would need to be listed as a revisiting site, Nonetheless, I will sneak-in again into this room many more times to collect my personal belongings, supposedly at empty hrs no one would see. Ninety percents of my belongings are still in the room by the time of logout. 5.50 PM LAST LOGOUT - RETIRED. I drove home at 6.45 pm, leaving behind the history of recorded 32 years 8 months 8 days.

The last visit to the office was 2007 May 29 Tue. It was 7.30 am. Final update in through After then it did not matter the cc would erase or would keep the files, close to 700 mb. The following update would be at Then again 6.30-8.00 pm accompanied by Muzani and Asrizalni. All personal belongings were home, except a pair of brown slippers, and a 15" crt philips monitor which may have mulfunctioned. I did not feel to have to include the office in my revisiting list; including the staff and the people around other than those already done.

A flashback 1986 Mar 26 Wed: On my return, Wednesday March 26 I found that my office was burgled, the door was broken opened. Curiuosly, when the security was called in, nothing was visibly stolen; everything on the table, in the cabinets, and in the drawers looked untouched. Who might have done it? And for what? The next day, a letter arrived in my pigeon hole; it was a poison-pen letter dated March 21, invoking the past 69-70 in SAS. Who might have written it? Only about two weeks later I noticed what were stolen from my office: it was my foreign notes collection stuffed in the passport wallet, the most was the pound notes the surplus of 1983; all estimated to totalled up to 1.5 kRM; and a week later a post-dated cheque in a file in one of the folio in the drawer of one of the two filing cabinets (valid on the last day of March). It was a very clever and professional burglar indeed! I did not think there was any relationship between the burglary and the poison-pen letter. Several letters like the latter came occasionally, especially during near exam time, but I knew they were from the first year students who took my SK1062 paper, under pressure to get A grade for admission to the medical faculty.

2007 Apr 20 Fri

First day retirement. The routine was just like a leave. But today was friday. Being a 'freeman', the routine eclipsed with the feeling of the friday weekend in Terengganu. Some academic jobs were still unaccomplished in UKM as of yesterday. Surely they would get in touch to get them done. Many could not understand the mechanics that were going on. They would contact on certain assumptions that later to be found all wrong.

Copy of new, fresh, clean bill of tax arrived, dated 2007 Apr 20. With nopay for Apr, no pension yet into the acc, I charted the 'table' for the mission journeys to Galaxies 1, 2, and 3, if it could be of any help. Galax 3 perhaps almost settled with the new copy. 1 is greatly dependent on 2. And I never believe 2 would sincerely smile to you.

But that would be after 2007 Apr 23-28, the usual biannual gathering of the MatriQ matters in Seremban Royal Adelphi. Without a teaching "portfolio" this would be the last frolic. I began the MatriQ frolic in Guoman Resort, Port Dickson in 2003 Jul 8. Those were the friends and colleagues in the meeting from the many local universities, established, or new. Many I had met before. And many more I newly met there. Many would follow closely. And some would be stunned to be told that.

2007 May 4 Fri, the Golden handshake LPG

Arrived on the same date at home the Golden handshake LPG, dated obsoletely 2007 Apr 10 - supposedly settled, as goodwill gesture to the retiring staff - before retirement. It was for 120 days - each day one thirtieth of the last drawn pay. A hundred more days of my leave were burnt during the past 32 years. I simply did not bother to use up all the leave because so much things to do, plus I rarely go anywhere other than going home to Terengganu two or three times a year, each not more than five days.

On inquiry on the Floor 4, she said it was just banked-in. Together was the eventual Apr pay. Calculated simply by 19/30 factor on every item, to give 4914.99.

2007 May 8 Tue, Jln Raja Laut

Second mission travel, to Galax 2, the provident fund, Jalan Raja Laut. The mission was to get the clearance certificate for Galax 1 to switch on the pension music. It would be a letter saying that the fund, KWAP, had been transfered. And with a bit of luck, to withdraw the balance accumulated from the employee contribution, the excess from the amount I withdrew in 1986 20k to build my current home. With Ujang Suki, an LA who retired Apr 15. Set out in early afternoon from ukm komuter and reached at 12. Approached the reception desk. Being told what to do and what to show for the purpose. After filling the form. I had with me only the membership number. I did not bring the bank passbook. Broke off to Jalan Tun Perak's CIMB for an account info. Acquired it, and had other things photocopied in Jalan Melayu on the way back to Jln Raja Laut. Got into the Q again, but the withdrawal form first needed to be filled in black, not in blue. Shortly, my number was shouted, preceeded by Ujang's (different counter).

The form that had to be filled in black; the print out of acc info (edited) from the bank helpdesk terminal containing all the particulars needed, but was not acceptable because of no bank signature or stamp.

On 'dealing at the counter', I was told that in there, only withdrawal was dealt with. The clearance certificate was definitely to be made in Jalan Gasing. And in Jln Gasing, withdrawal can also be made. Then, the bank info was not acceptable because it was not endorsed by a bank stamp. Thus payment could not be made through the acc number that I subscribed. She suggested to open a new acc at the bank next door. I said no, I do not want extra bank acc because I am retired, and I do not have any other source. In that case she suggested the payment had to be made by cheque, and that I have to come again to collect. I said, it's ok, I don't mind coming here as many times as she wants, as long as every time I come here I will collect a cheque. She brushed through her computer screen, talking to the screen all the time. Finally she concluded, the 'calculation' has not been done yet for my account. I had to go to deal with in Jalan Gasing to speed it up if so needed. For consolation, she processed all the withdrawal form. Printing both of my thumbs like every where in the form like in every page, she said to express the process whenever the 'calculation' has completed. That was very nice indeed. Actually she was a very nice officer. Full of respect for an old man in need of the service she was the employee. By then it was 1.30. Mission unaccompalished. I took Ujang to cross the street, to the opposite building: Dewan Bandaraya Kuala Lumpur, to see two friends. One a constant one, the other I had not seen since 1970. He is the Mayor of Kuala Lumpur.

While in town, 2007 May 8 Tue, I had the opportunity to pay a short visit to a 1970 oldie SAS-ian, I have not met since: the city of Kuala Lumpur Mayor, Datuk Abdul Hakim Borhan. Got him at the ten minutes he had after zohor prayer through a constant buddy Mohd Embong in the same DBKL. In that ten minutes 'reunion' we were talking more of the future than the past. 2007 is the retiring year for us, those born 1951. Soon we will stop blinking on the radar screen a piece at a time, and slowly will lose each other. A few 'lucky enough' would nonetheless keep the sq for a couple of years more.

Hakim was a bona fide school boarder in the 1970's years in Sekolah Alam Shah (SAS). A prefect, and very active in the field extra-curriculum. Very obidient, and accomplished all the task given. Satisfactorily. Had he checked-in 1967, instead of 1969, he could had been the HB. Hakim could have made CheGu Ghazali kept his idea to himself for quite a while, and I were not known to him then.

Hakim was born a manager. His name, his character to as much as I know in 1970's, and his posture. A friend who always wanted to be with, and always put a friend at his place. I was not lucky enough to be his constant friend after 1970 frolic in SAS. He is the Hakim Borhan, even today 2007 May 8, thirty seven years apart.

2007 May 10 Thu Jalan Gasing

Second mission journey. Reproceeded in Jalan Gasing, Petaling Jaya. In Ujang's A/B which he drove in the late morning to avoid the congestion. We were directed at front desk straight to the (later known as the infamous floor) third floor of B block. Out of the lift, left through the door into a small waiting space with a barrier bar, glassed, a space, and a full partition to the ceiling behind the space, no one knows what were going on behind the partition. And the orgies of agony began. Judging by the mood of those already there when we arrived, no body would smile at you there, not even the co-clients. A security-ed door on the right. The officers kept coming out and going in almost every minute. Their mood also unamused seeing the waiting clients, many were oldies. There was no particular person behind the bar. No turn ticket. From time to time, some one came out, he-she was a new person. Shouting a name, attending, went in, disappeared. Many minutes later, a new person came out, repeated the ritual. And so on.

Ujang and I squeezed in, and eventualy we were attended after a he served a client I believed having the case similar to ours, who left happily after the attention. Every one was given a pink form to fill while being attended. The form was apparently to declare the reason for wanting the matter to be "speeded up". In actuality, the client had to visit the counter because nothing was going on for the past several months. Ours were not so severe. Apr 20 to May 10. Merely twenty days. And we were very lucky to live around. We could come here even three times a day, if needed. Judging by the note in the form, a case is severe when it is over two months.

Others were visibly more miserable than us. Oldies (ironically nicked "golden citizen") with daughters accompanying, some with the son of a friend, and reltives, and there was one by a medic from the hospital across the highway. Some involved with death case, netted in the web of amanah raya, shariah court, etc.

We were attended again. By then I could not sure myself whether he was the same person who initially attended. Verdict: The matter would be dealt with as quickly as possible. He asked me to come again and collect it in two weeks time. Thank you. Feeling rather done. We were thinking of going there to "collect" in three weeks time, giving them a buffer of a week. Judging by the parking fee we paid, (2+1+1) rm, we were there for (1+0.5+0.5) hr. Real time, 11 am to 2.30 pm. Mission: Unaccomplished.

2007 May 12 Sat, The Baucar

Arrived from the base. The postman apparently sent it somewhere else sometimes ago because the address in the doc was written wrongly. The lot number was not 3084. Luckily it was neighbouring, and landed in one of the (former) colleague's place.

The voucher, dated 2007 Apr 24, from the university for the payment said to be made on 2007 May 4 Fri, bundled together the golden hand shake the LPG of which arrived 2007 May 4 Fri, and the apr pay, including its detail particulars. They were compressed into one small box, written in the accounting language admittedly I did not undertand. They did not understand that we did not understand the accaunting language, and they never bother to modify. It said something, but I could not figure out how my final tax return was dealt with by the university. Dated today I posted (May 21) a letter to bendahari, enquiring supposedly the tax deduction, which I had cleared 2007 Apr 11 by hand. And I got what I asked for: 2007 May 28 rebuttal, the particulars of which were written in common language that I could understand.

2007 May 12 Sat Pension Approval

Arrived from Galax 2. The copy to base, dated Apr 23, posted date May 9. The so-called approval statement. It showed only that the university (assistant) registrar had done an excellent job. Letter date-wise, I mean. The postmen that dilated the days into months. For to-be-retiree, after all, it was only the copy.

Arrived together was the card, the most precious gear during the retirement. I was glad to see that, my affiliation was still there untouched even though the teaching post, gone. In the teaching profession it is something unique about the post and the affiliation. When the post was created, the affiliation was embedded. The military solved this "tribute" by tagging the (B) to the post he was last hold on to. Perhaps the academician should be allowed to do the same thing as a tribute to their parts in the "great cycle of life". Of course except the "profesor emiritus".

The letter with the watermark enlightened the spirit to go on. But wait, this is not the show yet. And the show would not start until Galax 2 return the vault key, just a letter, that the fund was safely transfered from the galaxy to Galax 1. The battle for the key is an episode for every to-be-retiree. Apparently the battle is fiercer for those not-yet-to-be-retiree but in need in different desperate situation, and many times for some body else's situation.

2007 May 17 Thu

A not so surprise "news" from the human resource, dated 2007 April 30, on visiting the office, which demonstrated only one thing in the university: UNCONCERNED. And thus mechanically OXYMORONIC. Eighty days later, I had yet to receive a document, or a sign of follow up. I did not find an opportunity to thank them.

The matter was hinted to me by the chairman 2007 Mar 23 Fri by phone at home while I was on retirement leave. For I was yelling very loud about it for the past couple of years. He might have just got something else he did not want to tell me straight forward for pitying me. That was why he called to tell the "farewell favour". On my leaving, and all the pension arrangements were made based on DS54 P1T10. It jammed there close to ten years because the only way to move was to go down to P2T10 which in university terminology meant promotion but I was not good enough for promotion.

I argued that it was not a promotion because it did not involve a new grid. The move was within the grid. But one need an excellence mark to move along a vertical line in a grid. Of course I lost the reasoning because the managers and my comprehension differed a great deal.

Thus, I did not expect very much about this. Neither the farewell from the university and the school. I did not farewell them, thus it is a square fair that in return, I am not farewelled. It may eventually lost in the flawfullness of the university, together with my unforgiveness to whoever deliberated it.

The DS54 P1T10 that I had been collected was from 2003 Jan 1, raised from P1T9 of SSM in 2002 Oct, converted (with a change in the figure) from the same point in SSB. And that P1T9 was from 1996 Apr 1. Thus since eleven years ago I had one point move in 2003, only just one pay rise: in 2002. And that was because of salary move from SSB to SSM. And that was despite I passed the hurdle of PTK6, the highest in DS54 in 2003 Oct.

I posted a letter to ukm, asking for the sake of curiosity. And see what the rensponse would be. Had to cc to jpa for it take into account in the "final judgement". Nothing happened either from UKM or JPA, until Aug 30 when I received some cookies, through a concerned friend, an LPG, effective from 2007 Jan 1, about the point movement, dated 2007 Aug 10, delivered to my ex-office, although it was noted that I had retired since Apr 19. I then had a small arrears, ca. 2k. And am not sure who should initiate the proceeding to update my pension point at JPA. This is a clear deliberate inefficiency of the rusting ukm. This is the true identity of the current ukm who from time to time try to hide behind all those "awards", including that "Anugerah Perdana Menteri" 2007 which was very loudly "megaphoned" beyond the galactical dimension.

In the cookies envelop was also a piece of sub-moronic product. The meeting was for Aug 14. The appointment letter dated Jul 4. The sub-ceo must be smiling when he signed the letter to endorse it. I bet he was in delirious ecstacy of self satisfaction for successfully "denied" my being loaned to the ministry by "hoarding" it. On the other hand, I was not so sure whether he was sure of what he was doing. I had retired since Apr 20. He endorsed the letter dated two and a half months after my retirement. And sent it to my ex-office. And the meeting was for about four months after my retirement. He had no business whatsoever with endorsing my appointment. It was so physically moronic piece of creature indeed. And I missed the meeting.

A "senseless" answer eventually decended. 2007 Sep 13 Thu. And that was by the goodwill of the school peon, Nahamanie, and a constant buddy since the 1970's time in the chemistry, Prof Ambar. The date, the address, and the admission, all did not make sense without the personal help of the buddies.

2007 May 22 Tue 02-01-02-SF0125

I was informed by my (former) colleagues, Dr Pauzi (and Dr Jumat) that the application that we dip in deep in 2006 Nov was finally granted. Effective from Jul 1, 2007 for 24 months. As applied, the title content depended very much on my expertise - basically the polymeric chemical modification of chitosan. It was actually my area. The UKM-ST-FRGS0007-2006 MR60K led by Dr Ishak, apparently was by name only, although I signed the papers as well. To note later on the names in the paper.

2007 May 29 Tue Jalan Gasing and shut down the ex-office.

Went to the ex-office early in the morning. Final check. Every thing "in order". Turned every switch off. Pressed the door knob. Shut the door. Gedebooommmm. Tat, ketat. Bye. I did not feel that I would need to come to this room any more. Every key of the room was in the general office from the beginning. I still kept mine, but it would be thrown into the bin.

Third mission journey; to Galax 2. Rereproceeded (again) in Jalan Gasing, Petaling Jaya. We gave one week buffer. I drove Ujang. Arrived and straight to the third floor of B block. We gave the "indicator letter" and the tango began. Many more cases were being attended than that we saw May 10. One was in the wheel chair, complete with all the "hospital gears" around his neck. One case was "flying" without an answer. The client demanded to see the person who signed the letter. When she appeared, the client (a she) gave a sermon the "attendant's" boss would not give. Every one in the cloak listened in agreement in silent. A tan sri popped out of the lift, with a helper. He waited for ca. ten minutes when a young lady came out of the security door; shouted for the tan sri's name who was right in front of her nose (meaning she never heard and knew the tan sri). Both disappeared into the belly of the office. The tan sri came out after ca. ten minutes. Smiling and very cheerful.

Eventually, after ca. half an hour, our names were shouted from behind the glassed bar. Ujang case was deferred again. The officer said his info had not been laision ("pumped in") yet by JPA. She wrote a note for Ujang to take to JPA in Putrajaya to speed up the pumping. Mine was in three envelops. One for JPA, one for UKM, and the last one for me. My contribution was eventually "calculated" for the KWAP, and it was "in black". My curiosity built up. She told me to go downstair. Have a check at the kiosk, then Q to see any counter for the withdrawal procedure. We did exactly as told. After a very short wait, we were seen. And the counter communicated that, withdrawal procedure had began since May 10 in Jln Raja Laut.

Probably this was the last mission journey to Galax 2 for this matter. But the mission was not yet accomplished. I posted the letter to the two recipients at Bangi PO the next day; the former by 24-hr express service, but the latter (knowing that it was for information only) by ordinary snail-mail for the letter.

Jun 20 Wed, a close friend called for our updates. I told him my current s.q. and asked for the detail to "share with".

2007 Jun 28 Thu, The Gratuity

After about a month, a registered mail arrived at home from Galax 1. The "eventuality". Dated Jun 12 and Jun 13 respectively. Yes, it waited for the "key" from Galax 2 to proceed.

Everything was in order. Every one was happy. The pension was to start Jun. Meaning the IBG would be dated 20th, from Jun, to include that of May 20 from the first day retirement Apr 20 - "work and pay". Meaning by now an IBG is already in the cimb. Jul 20 would be the normal "laminar" flow.

But a meteorite appeared from a distant galactical unknown to me. For the first time in 32 years 8 months 8 days, I heard that. That I "have" a federal housing loan that would be deducted from my pension from Jun 01, 2007 to Jun 01, 2029 (that's 22 years) for 888.55 rm monthly. That is 234,577.20 rm. I wondered how much was the "loan" that I had "taken". And for "which house" was it. The address? please! Umm, very interesting indeed.

I posted the rebuttal to jpa, dated Jul 2. Cc-ed to ukm, asking for clarification to jpa that I never committed myself to the loan. UKM communicated dated the next day, that its communication with jpa was echoed that it was purely a technical error. There would be no deduction whatsoever. To this date I have not receive any "correction" by words from jpa. It would be very hard for me to be alive by 2029. My smallest #8son would be twenty nine - would be out of the scheme. But my wife may.

2007 Jul 25 Wed, The New Phase

Visiting cimb in ukm's unikeb to laision with the development all this while. Unprecedented smile and cooperative tellar. Perhaps because of seeing the "baki", she felt to share the "happiness" it could bless.

An IBG obviously descended on Jun 20, but the amount was a "mysterious". It was more than the anticipated May 20 and Jun 20 together.

The product of Jalan Gasing mission journey May 29 was also anticipated. But I did not anticipate this figure, judging from the printout that came out from the kiosk in comparison to the "calculated" figure that we were given after the mission. If this was it, why was not even a statement about it. I wished this was not it.

The Jul 19 IBG was more plausible. The bigger number was for the national pay augementation which took effect from 2007 Jul.

And thus with some plus and minus, the laminar flow of the new phase commenced. A retiree was delivered, to go on with an ordinary life like others.


2007 Jul 18 Wed

Being told by Prof Musa 11.30 am (from a phone call from Rohaya who initially wanted the marks, about which I asked to talk to the chairman) that the office was intruded (he did not know exactly the date) and PCs were selvaged by Hani Azlin Hussin Shaukat, the faculty's Pegawai Sains ICT. 9.30 pm, after many hours of deep thought, posted the e-mail to the (former) chairman. Got the SMS reply from Dr Ambar immediately (he was in the USA). The chairman apologised the next day 2007 Jul 19 Thu on behalf of the pusat, followed by SMS by Dr Jumat, and in the afternoon a phone call from Dr Harun. Rohaya apologised in a mail 2007 Jul 20 Fri on behalf of the office staff. With that, I think it was no point to go there again to 'surrender' officially the office and the contents, and the things to be "faraid". It was unofficially surrendered by having make it "public" to be selvaged. A very young staff, graduated, but not necessarily educated, just got into the faculty after I extricated out myself from the faculty ICT coordinator, and the STPD-iosis of 1113. But seeing her in many meetings of webmaster of which I was the perpetual one for the PPSKTM, to the last day of my tenure. In many meetings I noticed that she was irked of what I opined and said. In the webmaster meeting I attended 2007 Jan 12 Fri, chaired by the deputy who was furious (talk in front of a mirror, not through a glass) about the faculty's webpage which was criticised as unupdated and "ugly". I suggested that it be sourced out. The faculty "handlers" did not seemed to like it because of the budget constraint, and because they know that those were not very difficult to make.

And my name was erased by the "webmaster" from the faculty's web before the pusat and faculty farewelled officially in the meetings. In Pusat, I believe the name would stay for a little time longer, until a new shrek is found by the chairman to rework on what I had furnished, or if he-she smart enough, to start a new one of his-her own creation. But that would happen only in a new "Web Season", which usually comes with a new torrent of imaginations. However, behaviours varied erratically with the regalia.

During the webmasters meeting 2007 Jan 24 Wed (my last ICT things meeting), I restressed the need to sourceout to unstress the load on the faculty webmaster whose "pay was neglected". And it was endorsed that the update was to be done by the faculty webmaster, the faculty photographer, and the faculty "Pegawai Sains ICT". And since then the faculty's webpage had change from bad to worse. And since then nobody in the faculty criticised.The deputy dean got what she asked for.

Some of the faculty staff who attended the ICT course (#4 2004 Mar 30-31 - my last) that I gave. I was dictated when I was given, and in return by natural law of conservation, I dictated when I give.

The Farewell 2007

2007 Nov 16 Fri

The PPSKTM eventually organised a farewell for those retired 2007, seven altogether. Four were "the budak hitam". I was the first that "mati tepi jalan". The other three were Dr Md Pauzi Abdullah, Dr Ibrahim Baba, and Dr Mohd Wahid Samsudin; all were "rescued". The fifth, Dr Md Soot Ahmad would be next year 2008. Dr Maimunah Sokro, a junior, but retired this year, like me was also made to evaporate in the PPSKTM. The other two were Dr Mamot Said and Dr Suriah Abdul Rahman from Food Sc programme, and were also "rescued". It was in Bangi Golf Resort, 3 pm. I was sms-ed by my constant buddy Dr Ambar Yarmo since Oct 30 Tue, followed by a chat Nov 15 Thu who said that the past retirees were also invited, and the card was at my home when I returned Nov 1 Thu, including in the envelop a p-to-p invitation letter from the chairman, and a supposedly the PR rang when I was in my office Nov 12 Mon, and a final reminder by Dr Jumat the chairman Nov 16 Fri morning, and a misscall from Dr Amran Majid, perhaps during the occasion itself, Friday after Jumaat.

The fate was I DID NOT GO, because I could not go. And I did not want to go, and that I could not go had solved my dilemma. The programme in UDM was so "monsoonic", that even I had to burn my ticket for the thusday night. I was told that Dr Maimunah also did not go. When the event was taking place in Bangi, I was fast asleep in my PA home, in the cool rainy late afternoon below the monsoon cloud, tired after marking some of ASF3083 papers, the examination of which was yeasterday.

So I did not know what was happening and what was said. I could only imagined that, based on previous occasion like that in the past, the event was such a jovial one, especially with the presentation of "cenderahati" to the "retirees". And especially with the absent of the two "ill-fated" non-staff, the presentation, and the "ucapjasa", and the "balas ucapjasa", and the majlis in a piece went on as smooth as an eel. It would be like another "Hari Keluarga".

It would be an ODD for me to be in the midst of the laughters and merrying of the "retirees". Dr Maimunah would feel the same way had she been there too. The academia are so cheap these days. Philosophy doctors are made in the factory, like children toys, from the same plastic. The moulding heat that had made one different from the others. If I were there I would want to say something at the rostrum like I did for the Farewell 2005, which had not amused some of them, and they know that I would say something that would not tickle their nerve. It would give the organizer a hard decision not to let me to say something.

It was interesting to note the 5-minutes multimedia show. I guessed it would be about the retirees contribution to the UKM chemistry. My absent too had solved this dilemma, because I "did not contribute anything". That had made the life of the organizer very much easier. There were those even with the royal regalia to occupy the 5-minutes. It would be a slide show of pictures, and I bet it was made by Dr Harun Hamzah. I did not remember any nostalgic picture of me in the chemistry UKM that I had left, or were made to be left behind. Nor cert, nor award replicas. My traces in UKM is only in my webpages.

With that my history in UKM is written in complete, but sans tombstone. My exit point perhaps was written in a line that would be lost with many other obsolete docs.

2007 Dec 7 Fri

And a complete dead silence END.

Because it arrived three days after the event due to the notority wrong address which was never been corrected after being told so. I was then in a deep nap anyway recovering from the previous day hard drive in the monsoon drizzle all the way right from where we set out in Terengganu to Bangi.

Entered 2008

I had yet to finish the "business" with UKM which seemed to have forgotten that it had not fully complied its duty on my welfare which was affected by the change for the residual day in 2007 from Jan 01 to Apr 19.

The enquiry which I made had a "hammer and chisle" reply. Thank you, SIR. But whatever happened to their memory or comprehension about the consequence of the reply. The golden handshake, and most importantly the input to JPA about the change which would affect the gratuity and the pension point itself. Nothing had happened in 2007. Then entered 2008. Note the date: 2007 Jul 27, then 2007 Aug 10, and finally 2007 Sep 09. Note also the "arrogence" of sending the notice to the place my welcome had expired, and asking to collect at their office, instead of putting in the mail.

Undoubtedly they had miscarriaged their duty on my case. I thus wrote again. Apparently they admitted. But did not bother to reply to me. Instead just cc-ed the input they gave to JPA.
And settled their due. Again, with the help of Mani the office peon of my former Dept, and in a similar way of "arrogence" fashion. Notice again the date sequence: 2008 Feb 5, 2008 Feb 18, 2008 Mar 25. THE FILE WAS THEN CLOSED. Forever. Never mind the THANK YOU and GOOD-BYE. We shall meet again in different worlds. As I always said, we will meet the people we have met before.
The rest of the matter was then in JPA's Pension Section, the letter from which, dated 2008 Feb 21, had yet, to this date 2008 May 14, to materialise something. I had retired since 2007 Apr 20. More than twelve months ago. The hitch began with a letter dated 2007 Apr 30, ten days after I had gone. Which no one in the premise had any interest in it.

With a trickle only sixteen weeks later, 2008 Jun 04. Without a mention of any looking forward next move. Including the "event" that took place 2007 Jul 01.

Perhaps another sixteen weeks.

Fortunately no. Not sixteen weeks. They started working on it since Jun 20, through to Jun 24, which eventually delivered Jul 15.

With that, UKM had paid all its due. Fifteen months, less four days, after I delivered all my due to it. With that 'we' could have cut the "BERKERAT ROTAN BERPATAH ARANG".

My 'ghosts' in UKM were still being recognised by some. Until they themselves become the 'ghosts'. Until then, my ghosts would make sure my history there is being taken care of.

:::::::THE END::::::::

Dated: 2008 Jul 19